How to negotiate your salary — and actually get it

The single biggest reason candidates accept the first number? Fear that pushing will tank the offer. In reality, recruiters almost never rescind over a polite, well-researched counter — they expect one. Companies bake a buffer into the first offer specifically because they assume you'll negotiate.

If you accept on the spot, you signal two things: that you don't know your market value, and that you don't advocate for yourself. Neither is the impression you want to make in your first week.

Before any salary conversation, you need three numbers in your head: your target, your floor, and your ask.

• Target: the realistic offer for someone with your skills, in this role, at this company size, in this metro. Use Levels.fyi, Glassdoor, Levels.fyi, Pave Comp, and recent Blind threads.
• Floor: the absolute minimum you'd accept. Below this and you walk.
• Ask: 10–20% above your target. This is what you put on the table first — it gives you room to negotiate down to your target.

Talk to two people who do this exact job at a similar-stage company. Friends-of-friends count. The number a peer says over coffee will be more accurate than any salary tool.

Never first. If a recruiter asks for your number on the screening call, deflect: "I'd love to learn more about the role before I commit to a number. What range do you have budgeted?"

If they push, give a range — your target as the bottom, 20% above as the top: "Based on my research for this level, I'm targeting $140K–$170K base, but I'm flexible on the total package."

When the offer comes, thank them, ask for it in writing, and tell them you'd like 24–48 hours to review. Never accept on the call. Then send this email:

“Hi [Recruiter], thank you so much for the offer — I'm really excited about [Company] and the chance to work with [Team]. I want to be transparent: based on my market research for [Role] at this level, plus a competing conversation I'm wrapping up, I was hoping we could land closer to $[ask]. The role and team are my top choice — if we can get there, I'm ready to sign today. Open to creative structures (sign-on, equity refresh, accelerated review). What can we do?”

Why this works: it's specific, it's grateful, it gives them a clear path to yes, and it signals you're decisive. "Ready to sign today" makes them want to close the deal.

First, slow down. "No" almost never means "no on everything." It usually means no on the specific lever you pulled. Try this:

• "I understand base is capped. Could we revisit equity, sign-on bonus, or an accelerated 6-month review?"
• "What would I need to demonstrate in the first six months to earn that number?"
• "Is there flexibility on PTO, remote days, or title?"

If everything is a hard no and the offer is below your floor, decline politely and stay in touch — markets shift, budgets re-open, and a graceful no often turns into a great offer six months later.

Base salary is rarely the only lever. Sometimes it's not even the best one — equity at the right stage can dwarf cash, and a guaranteed retention bonus can lock in upside without burning headcount budget.

• Sign-on bonus: easiest yes — comes out of recruiting, not headcount budget. Ask for $10K–$25K to bridge a base gap.
• Equity: at startups, ask for refresh grants. At public companies, ask for an additional RSU grant year one.
• PTO: 2–5 extra days is usually approvable.
• Remote/hybrid flexibility: rarely a hard no if you frame it around output.
• Title: a level bump (e.g. Senior → Staff) compounds far longer than a one-time salary bump.
• Start date: extra time to wrap up commitments or rest is real comp.

“Subject: Re: [Company] Offer — Quick Question Hi [Recruiter name], Thank you again for the offer to join [Company] as [Role]. I'm genuinely excited about the team and the [specific project / mission]. I want to be straightforward: based on my research and a competing process, I was hoping we could land closer to $[ask] base. The role is my top choice — if we can get there on base or via a sign-on / accelerated review, I'm ready to sign by end of week. Happy to discuss live if easier. Thanks for considering. [Your name]”